The almighty .plan

Mon, 15 Feb 2010 00:00:00 +1100

No updates in the last 2 months because I saw no reason to
post about the pains that still make it hard to type, or how
miserable, tired and lonely I feel. Today I will mention
something which really aggravates that last problem - people
at work who walk past me and look the other way.

I "know" nearly all the staff at RMITCS by face and name,
and they "know" me in that sense. But few have any interest
in actually getting to know me, or even talking to me. Many
don't even look at me or greet me or respond in any way to
my greeting.

Fairly confident that none of them are going to read this.

Five years ago when I first started working here, I was a
little uncomfortable, often treated like a feckless child by
some of the TSG members. Despite that I still felt like
"part of the team". Now I feel simply unwelcome here.

At least the _students_ seem to appreciate my efforts (the
undergrads, anyway). Whenever I feel unwanted I try to focus
on the dozen-odd happy students who came up to me after they
had gotten their marks for Comp Org or Operating Systems,
who told me that they were sure they would have failed
without my tutorials.

Even this depresses me, when I realise there is nowhere for
me to go here. Being a good DP or tutor is a path to
nothing. Although lecturers are teachers first and foremost,
getting the job depends on your research, not teaching
abilities or experience. Now that TSG is no longer part of
CS, my 5 years of experience as a DP aren't worth anything
to anyone.

I could try to get a job elsewhere, and may even be
successful. I'm not sure that would be a good idea, all
things considered. Apart from the extra time (which I
haven't had much of, since 2007) and the extra travel (see:
time), I doubt I will find it easier to make friends at a
business than a university (not that the university seems to
be working).